Don’t violate psychological factors if there are contradictions after marriage
Many married people have such feelings: before marriage, Qingqing me, I was not as good as Sanqiu in one day, and even some people came together with a strong penetration that their parents did not agree.
But after marriage, the dreams of marriage are full of good wishes but have been replaced by chai oil and salt, so some trivial contradictions are increasing at the same time.
Some people can’t help asking themselves: Is it their wrong choice?
In fact, the contradictions that appear after marriage have psychological factors.
The so-called rebellious psychology is an opposite experience that occurs when the same things acting on an individual exceed the threshold of individual sensory acceptance and saturate the individual senses.
It manifests itself as: the more things you can’t get, the more you want, the more things you can’t touch, the more you want to touch.
And once you get it, you do n’t cherish it.
The higher the external blood pressure, the more obstacles there are, the stronger the rebellious psychology, and the stronger the pursuit.
And once it is truly combined, the original lack of urgency and desire to compete also disappears.
Means that the distance between ideal and reality has caused an internal imbalance.
Some psychologists have listed such a formula: happy life = reality-expectation.
It means that the degree of happy life depends on the difference between the actual value and the expected value.
When the difference is positive, life is happy and happy; when the difference is zero, life is stable before and after; when the difference is negative, you will be pessimistic and disappointed.
Marriage has transformed the purely emotional relationship between the two sexes into an interdependent survival relationship. In the past, when it was in love, it was a coffee shop, a restaurant, a tea room, but now it is a pot and a bowl.
The problem of survival also brings new interpersonal relationships based on a common life, such as the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, father-in-law and son-in-law, sister-in-law and sister-in-law, etc., all of which have greatly reduced the actual value of reality, andThere is not a short distance from the expected value, which makes people feel disappointed and feel lost and disappointed.
The mystery disappeared.
Mystery is an important factor that constitutes emotional gravity. It makes people have a hazy beauty like watching flowers in the mist and watching the moon in the water.
The contact between lovers is intermittent and loose. The distance in time and space often makes the infatuated men and women idealize and perfect each other.
After entering the house, the husband and wife live together almost every day. At this time, the contact is continuous and close. Both of them are displayed in front of each other in real life.